Here it is a beautiful day with the skies a beautiful blue, white billowy clouds, warm sunshine and light tradewinds! Beauty all around me. Serenity too - it's quiet with only the breeze rustling through the trees.
Yet, my God has something to show me. I told myself when I started this blog that I would be transparent. I would share the good, the bad and the ugly about me. Ouch - am I ready for this? Well here goes....
"It came about when she pressed him daily with her words and urged him, that his soul was annoyed to death" Judges 16:16. Ever heard of Delilah? No not the one in Tom Jones' song (am I dating myself) but the woman who was so instrumental in bringing ruin to Samson? This scripture is talking about that Delilah and her relationship with Samson.
I am a woman of many words. I love to talk - what woman doesn't! When the Lord showed me this scripture I felt He was speaking about me. I know you're saying "no way" - ha ha ha! But truthfully, sometimes I can talk, talk and talk to my husband about finishing our on-going, unfinished projects that I truly believe, after reading Judges 16, that "his soul is annoyed to death". UGH!
What possesses me to behave like this? Is it my desire to control every and all situations? Yes. Is it because I feel I know what's best for us, for him? Yes. Is it that I feel I am justified in "pressing him daily" because some projects have been in the works for years and years? Yes, yes, yes! Don't you feel I'm right? Do you feel my pain?
Well God says I am like Delilah - ewwwwwh! I don't want to have any characteristics like Delilah. I want to be remembered for being a woman after God's own heart! And so, after my time with the Lord, trying to justify my behavior, I finally got it. God gives me these desires, these characteristics - like loving to talk, loving to be in charge, loving to make sure everyone's life is the way I want it to be; but He also gives me the Holy Spirit to guide me in the way to use these strengths. When I go on my own fuel, then I sput, choke, rant and rave. When I go on the Holy Spirits fuel/power, then I can take these strengths along with the fruit of the spirit (joy, love, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness and self control) and walk in faithfulness with God. Does that mean those projects will get done? When it's God's timing. Well it took God 25 years before He gave Abraham and Sarah their child, and it took 40 years according to God's timing to take the Israelites out of the desert, it took hundreds of years of captivity before they returned to Jerusalem - so I guess I don't have anything to complain about!!!
God's timing, God's way. Ever feel you're a Delilah? Are you trying to control your husband's life, or maybe you've given up on him and you're working on the kids? Let's run together from the Delilah in us! See ya!